AIRSPEED - Speed of an airplane. Deduct 25% when listening to a retired
Air Force pilot.
BANK - The folks who hold the lien on most pilots' cars.
CARBURETOR ICING - A phenomenon reported to the FAA by pilots
immediately after they run out of gas.
CONE OF CONFUSION - An area about the size of New Jersey located near
the final approach beacon at an airport.
DEAD RECKONING - You reckon correctly, or you are.
DESTINATION - Geographical location 30 minutes beyond the pilot's
bladder saturation point.
ENGINE FAILURE - A condition that occurs when all fuel tanks
mysteriously become filled with low-octane air.
GLIDE DISTANCE - Half the distance from an airplane to the nearest
emergency landing field.
HYDROPLANE - An airplane designed to land long on a short & wet runway.
MINI-MAG LITE - Device designed to support the AA battery industry.
NANOSECOND - Time delay between the Low Fuel Warning light and engine
PARASITIC DRAG - A pilot who bums a ride and complains about the service.
RANGE - Usually about 3 miles short of the destination.
ROGER - Used when you're not sure what else to say.
SERVICE CEILING - Altitude at which cabin crew can serve drinks.
SPOILERS - FAA Inspectors.
STALL - Technique used to explain to the bank why your car payment is late.
STEEP BANK - Banks that charge pilots more than 10% interest.
TURN & BANK INDICATOR - An instrument largely ignored by pilots.
USEFUL LOAD - Volumetric capacity of the aircraft, disregarding weight.
WAC CHART - Directions to the Army female barracks.
YANKEE - Any pilot who has to ask New Orleans tower to "Say again."